Hunger Games Trollfic (VIOWER EXCRETION ADVISD)

Yo my name is Katnaps Luna tatlor moonlet Evadeen and i liv in da distict 122 of pamen. i haf hare da colur of oplesznt daknes and flickerin orbz of da moon for mi eyez. i wuz tradin at da hub wif my bbbff gail and weh were tulkin with greesee sai. i lift wif a sqirll and a veggy we wint to da bakeri. Peta was there hawtly with hez blonde hair in spikers. he had a red on hes check weher his mom hit him.
I hugged pita cuz he was swisscidal and gail run awai depressedily. Ters hung dun his chin and he mewed. Petah storted to sub two.
“Nooooo!” i shoruted. Gaile and pesta ran away sadly.
I wint to haymick’s house. He was werring a perpy plaid dress with pigtails and a aeropostal tee. His rum was deccorted with pink and hilary dough and disney showz lik hanna montana and shook it upz. I laffed and rips down da posterz. Haymith cryz and jumped out da windo.
‘hesmitch!111” i yoled. I climed out da hous and garbed him. Blud was cascudin don his pigtails. I tussed him into da dumpster and he scremed.

Just den finik apeared nekkid. He was hawt but he wuz perpy. He had a sporkly megenda tordent and millie cirus earings.
‘katnis1; he yorkled. ‘com hither’
‘ewww no you perv’ i sluped finnik. ‘imma tell anny’ And stubbed him with da tordent.
I ran hom and jumped in da showre. as da wator fel on my glorous bodi i turned anound. It wuz finik and haymatch, sping on me!
‘EW YOU PERVS GET OUT MY HOUS!’’’ i yalded. I grabbeded a knif and stabbed finic and haymik in da heartz. They ran out da windre.

‘’anni! Anne!!” i yolled as i ran tords her house. I lept ovrs da fence. Anny was standin ovre a bunfyre. she was burnin fenick’s perpy stuff. da sporkly trodent was in da flames.
‘finik was stalkin me...!11!’ i clummed.
I kiked him out.’.’ annie sayed. ‘he’s a perp and he wuz doin it wif haymaick.’
I snutched finick’s shimery uniturd and tused it in da fire. Anny and i stood there talkin in da silense burnin da things.
Anenome and meh went in da house and riped down da posters. We druped dem in da flemz and laffed. den we wuthced da grudg whil talkin about gottik stuff. i went bak to da viktor villege and a horible sence meet mi eyez. fennick and haymatch were in da dumpstre, doin it, and beetee was wectching!

‘ew1!’ i shorkled as i ran away. Beatie stuyed der vidoetapping da whol thing. As i wuz runnin joanna creashed into me.
‘i luv you katnisp evadeen!!;’ she yielded. I gapsed. ‘gasp’ i say. ‘johanne are u a plebian?!’’
joanne nod. ‘i’m in luf wif peta!!111’ i yowled slaping her.
Joannah run away. I wunted to tel pita and gail about her but as i wulked tord da bakery i saw peeta tapped to da wall! He was crin down his face. Joanne jumped out form behand da wall. She was holdin an ax.
‘you muts be wif me catnis evadin’. She sayed. ‘or ill kil peta!’’
i storted cring tears but then gail appeard! He ripped petah down and stubbed joann with da ax.
‘thank u gail!’ i mooved as i hugged dem happly.

I wook up in my rum. When i ruled over i saw someon next to meh! he was a super smexy goffic guy wif gold eyelinear. He was nekkid. i new who he wuz. It was cinnia!
‘zinna”!1 i shout. He wook up. ‘wut happnd?’ he sayid.
‘waft cina why are weh in bad togetta’ i usked.
‘DID we zu portection’ cinna murmuered.
I hit zinnia with da pillow. ‘haymick and finick made me do it1; he admission.
‘orly’ i gorled.
‘yah rly’ sayd cenna. He wuz crying goffically so i couldnt me mad.
‘iz okai cinna’ i huged him. Den i shoved him out da windor so prime wuldnt see. I threw a rob aftre him so he wuzznt nekkid.
i ran over to haymick house and bork da windo wif a hamer. ‘haymith!’ i scormed. ‘why did i haf to du it wif cinna?11.’
der was no answre.


I wuz bout to go tord jaymick’s bassmant but i herd high heles cuming tords me. I luked up and sa a dude woring a feathre bo and a gilerty dres. he had drak skin and shrot hare in a weg. It was thersh!
‘wheres haymitch?!’1 i doormand.
‘in da bassment” thesh said. He led me to da door. ‘feneck’s deer too’, he worned.
Why are u here/?’ i aksed.
‘i’m portandin to be haimath’s mom,’. Thorsh reply.
I nood and brok da door down wif da hamer. Inseed haymitch had zinna teied do a chair! Cena was cring.
Finick wulked to meh and gaf me a knif. Behind him petah was teed to da wall!111
‘u must stub peeta’ haymack sad menosingly he was nekid. ‘if u dont i;ll kil cinnia!11’
i loked at cinnia and thut abut how depersed he wuz when we wok up togetta. But i luked at peeta wif his muscular but i had onneta idea. I garbed da knife and wuz abut to stub myslef when tesh cam in!11 his weg was fullin off. Tehn Fenick took teh knif and trew at thersh!


Da knif hit therssh but it bunced off his man berasts!1 i cut cinna and pita fre and we climmed out da windo. Wehn we gut outssed anny and gail were dere.
‘omtf what hoppend?” they ask.
I told dem da story and how thersh rescuoed us. I even add da part on how he wuz derssed as a gurl.
Den thorsh said, ‘i wuz lookin for my lung lost luf b4 i went to haymick’s’
Pita gapsed. ‘we shuld go on an adventur’
‘every1 get ready’ i said enthusicaly. ‘meet me here pornto’
dey all ran off to prepear for da adventur to find thorsh’s lov.
I cam bak an hur later and we al ran to da forest

As we trecked thru da trees i saw a figured in da distence. As we got clozer i saw who it wuz. It wuz parsidant sno!
‘karnis!1”. he yielded at me. ‘i haf abtained a messege for thee1’
i got closer in interst. Sno puled out a ipod. I gapsed as he plured a vidoe. Itwas ov meh and zinnia in da bed!11
‘post it on utub katnis’ parsidet snow demooned. ‘or pita shal dye’ I schlepped him and ran back to da group.
‘omfi what happen’ anny says
‘parsidint snow wants meh to spurd a vidoe of me doin it wif cena’ i sobbed selicitely.
Cinna brust into teers agin, and so ded i. i garbed a barcnch and storted to cut mi ristz. Ceinna did 2.
Just den a voic lumed over zu. ‘i am enobaro’ it sumoned. ‘da vampir quen’


Jost den enobaru cam111!/ she had lung guld fangz and a goffik blak clook. She was rlly gottik but nut a rl goff.
‘buttercup!11’ cinnea yelded. We all dushed awai but enobaru foluwed zu. Her clook pufed into gottik bats!!!11
i gapsed. Eniboria wuz a rell goff!
‘wut do u wunt?/ i said willst cuttn my wirst.s
anibari sturted to cri deazs of blud. ‘i am her to rescu u;;
just den a herd a bush!1 a dude wif no legs cam out. He had nu legs.
‘greetin cildren’ he said. ‘i’m bugs.’
We wer mettin alot of wird peepl. Den bugz storted to sing a goffik versoin of sexi noughty bithcy by tita young. He had a rly gottik voc.
‘ommgg11!’ i yielded.
We let enobaruu and bugs in da joruni. Den i herd efil laffter!11
I torned. Da bats flew awa from enoburai!11 her clook disapperated. She wuzn’t enobari!1 it was joanna!1111



‘katniss evergreen’ johann laffed evilly at meh. ‘u r a fool katnis eveyrgreen’
‘wft joanna’ i yielded at her. Den a garbed da knif and stubbed her and blud pored at lik waves.
Bugs cam up and hugged meh. thrash piked up joanna and tused her in da ocean. But den thrash was like :O
‘omg guyz’ he said. ‘luk’
we all run up to thresh. He punted in da distance. ‘ist her’
we luked closer and saw gasp. It wuz thrashs long love! She was a gottik gurl wif red hare and red eyez.
‘fuxface!111’ thrash yeilded. Dey ran tords each other and storted to french seixily.
Anny started to film dem with da ipod.
I culd see gail and peta gettin a buner. (deyre bisezxual) i garbed pita and sturted to french him. Gaile joined us. Dey tuk out deir mushroom gravysticks. I gut an orjy. But den i luked behend us. Dere wuz fennec and jaymitch, MASTABATTING to us!!!

What the actual f*ck, Emma-Byrd?

I HAVE NO REGRETS.

It started out as a tiny idea germinating in the darkest cavern of my tortured noggin.

Katnaps.

BEST NAME EVAR.

My favorite was misspelling Thresh as 'Thrash'.

and Annie as Anemone?

And Boggs as Bugs?

Cinna as Zinna?

And Zinnia.

Pretty sure I saw thriteen different spellings of "Gale".

Gail, Gayle, and just Gay.

One of my misspellings for Haymitch was going to be Gaymitch. I'll have to slip that in.

Here is another new chapter. :3


Thrash run ford. ‘thresh thrash!11lol’ he gorled. He tuk a rok and hit it on hamish”s skul. Finik screemed lik a leetl girl and ran away nekkid. we all cheared and pluyed bulletpruf hart on da ipod. Bugs sturted to sing and hes voice was goffik and sexy. Den a bat flew in!111 i thot joannah was cumin back but den da bat murphed!11 it was gorard wayy!
‘’omfg!’ i yieled and we al run up and huged him.
Gerard gave us tikits to a mcr concort! It wuz to be at dat evening.
We all wint to git ready. I put on a blak luther clook with cirmson lace stuf wif pink fishnets and sliver and red highheels. I pot skuls in mah ears and pot on alot of blak mascira and red eyelinear. Den i wint to met anemone, gayl, pesta, zina, thrash, fuxface, and bugz. We all wint in thrash’s goffik red flying convertable to da concirt.

Oh my God.

Boggs singing My Chemical Romance.

I have to stop making myself laugh.

Pesta and Fuxface made me laugh.

'Thresh thrash!1'

That reminds me of the Incredible Hulk.

"HULK SMASH!!!! RAAWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRR"

That's what I was going for.

You have mastered the art of awesome references!

There's a few nods to the fanfic My Immortal, as well. :3

**stupified** Wazzat?

I really would suggest you look it up. :3 It's a very famous, and very bad, fanfic. It's set in the Harry Potter universe, and the main character, Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way, is a huge Mary-Sue.

Another new chapter:

Da concort was rlly corwded witf goffs and punks. We all wint to da fornt so we culd stage dive. Jared was dere singing a goffik versoin of mooves like jager.
‘we shuld totlly start our own bund!1’ said thrash goffikly with his red eyelinear runnin down his eyez cuz he was crin.
We all agred happly. As we left da concert some1 said, ‘hello dere’
We turned and saw two goffik twins. Dey were blond lik pita but deir hair had blud red streaks and wuz all spiky. ‘we r cashmare and glus’ dey said. ‘can we join ur band? U seem cool’’
I thougt dat glus and castmare were creepy but dey were gittik so they were prolly nice.
‘ok i said’ i said. Dey were so hppy and dey shewed us a goffik rasor dey had and we al cut or ristz lol. We all wint in thrash’s flying convirtiable and wint hom.

. . . I'm pretty sure my mind just imploded.

Mooves like Jäger.